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6 Tips For Finding Happiness In Your Relationship

All over the world, divorce is on the rise. In America, some estimates say that more than half of all marriages come to an end. Why is that? Most of us think that love is wonderful and we all dream of meeting that perfect someone and getting married and living happily ever after. If you're in a relationship and struggling, then take a look at these five tips to finding happiness in your relationship.

happiness in your relationship Begin by Understanding That Compatibility Doesn't Equal a Successful Relationship

Unfortunately, far too many people base their hopes on what they think of as a compatible partner. Studies, however, have shown that typical compatibility benchmarks don't work. Many of us look for people who are very similar to ourselves, and we think if we find that kind of person then we will be able to have a long-term relationship with them more easily.

Studies done on successful and unsuccessful couples have shown that although it seems to make sense that someone similar to yourself would make for a more successful relationship, it is not the case, according to the evidence. In relationship after relationship, it was found that those who were compatible and those who shared little in common had similar rates of success and failures. That should make you ask why that is.

Why Arguing is Part of a Healthy Relationship

The reason the average person looks for someone compatible is to avoid conflict. Most folks believe that if they find someone similar to themselves, then they'll get along well and they will understand each other, and that means there will be less conflict. Anyone who wants a long-term relationship should understand that conflict is part of it. In fact, it has been demonstrated again and again that those who no longer fight and argue are no longer communicating and this almost inevitably leads to a failed relationship.

When two people begin a relationship, they need to understand that conflict will happen and they need to be prepared for it. This also means that they need to be willing to experience that conflict over the full course of the relationship. Trying to avoid conflict and arguments in a relationship is like trying to avoid eating to keep from gaining weight. There are healthy things that you can do to maintain a healthy weight, but avoiding eating anything isn't one of them. In the same way, wanting to avoid arguing in a relationship isn't healthy.

If Compatibility Doesn't Determine Success in a Relationship  width= Then What Does?

Because compatibility, or the lack of it, will not stop the inevitable conflicts that are sure to come about in a relationship, then what seems to be more important in ensuring a successful relationship is the ability to argue in a similar way. When one person believes that the best way to handle conflict is to avoid it and not speak about it and the other person thinks it's best to talk about it and get it out, then this is a couple that is not compatible in the way that they handle conflict. It doesn't really matter if they both like the same types of movies or music, it matters more if they argue and express their feelings and emotions in a similar way.

It should be noted that men and women are always going to talk and express themselves somewhat differently, and yet there can be some shared compatibility in how they express feelings and confront conflict. If they can do it similarly and yet still do it somewhat differently, this is a relationship that can often find happiness and success.

Effective Communication Within a Relationship is Key

This point goes hand in hand with the point above. Many relationships fail because of a lack of communication. The partners talk at each other instead of with each other. When both partners in the relationship feel understood, this will lead to a greater sense of happiness within the relationship. When this effective communication takes place, it not only makes each person feel understood and listened to but also respected.

This all lends itself to a feeling of contentment, safety, and happiness. It takes practice to be able to communicate effectively. It was already mentioned that men and women communicate in different ways, but there are opportunities to bridge the gap if both partners are willing to talk and listen and learn to understand their partner.

 width= Why A Happy Relationship Can Keep You Healthy

One of the most common factors in many of today's chronic illnesses is stress. Scientists are finding that those who have a happy relationship with a partner are generally healthier and typically live longer. 1 According to some studies, those who are in a happy relationship actually produce more stress-reducing hormones than those who are in no relationship or a toxic one.

How Essential Oils Can Be Used To Reduce Stress And Aid Your Efforts To Have A Happier Relationship

Because stress is such a prevalent factor in today's society, it has a powerful effect on many areas of our lives. This is no less true than when it comes to our relationships. If we are constantly under stress, it has a powerful effect on our mood and our outlook on life. We can become toxic and drive away anyone who cares about us. Learning to use essential oils and aromatherapy have been shown in studies and surveys to be an effective method of reducing stress .

Those who can find ways such as using essential oils to lower their stress levels will find that they have a more positive outlook on life and this helps them be better prepared to handle the complexities that come up in a relationship. 2 It also means that they are happier in general and that makes them more pleasant to be around. This will encourage the partner you're in a relationship with to be pleasant in kind.

Practice A Healthy Lifestyle To Achieve Greater happiness in your relationship Happiness

Happiness within a relationship is achieved by each person understanding that it is not your partner's responsibility to make you happy. Once you can understand this fact, you can take charge of your own happiness. One of the best ways to experience a more consistent state of happiness is through practicing a healthy lifestyle.

Incorporating things like yoga and meditation, along with using tools such as aromatherapy, help your body and mind to reach a state of contentment and relaxation; this opens you up to experience more happiness. As you become happier, you begin acting in a way that creates a happy atmosphere within your relationship. You will then have the key to achieving another level of happiness in that relationship.

Photo Credits: AlejandroJ.deParga/, WAYHOMEStudio/, GeorgeRudy/, g-Stockstudio/, Mauro_grigollo/

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